Unwritten

I have written several stories. Each story is a little different but they all have the same principle elements. Each story has a little drama, romance, adventure and a little fantasy. But the two things that they never have are overwhelming conflict in the middle of the story and an ending (I rarely finish my stories). I don't like that part in the narrative where conflict erupts. That moment where it's all about to come crashing down. I can't bare to watch as the heroes struggle. Maybe its because in real life the struggle has already been going on from the beginning. It's out of place when conflict  appears halfway through a story. When I watch it play out before my very eyes I feel helpless in the hands of the destruction that is in front of me. Maybe I'm afraid that the hero will not be able to rise again if they fall even one more time.

I see plenty of people drowning every day in a sea of doubt, depression and hopelessness and there are not enough life preservers to go around. So then why haven't I drown, what makes my story so different?  I realize that not in spite of, but because of, these rough waters I learn how to swim for my survival, and I became strong. Strong enough in fact to be the life preserver for others. You see I may not like the sea of great conflict but in that conflict I develop a strength that is only produced by my determination to rise out of the waters. It is also the only way I could have found so many more like me, tossed and turned by each relentless wave. I found my shore. I found my refuge and I could let fear tell me not to go back in for the countless others drowning. I could try to flag them over or yell encouraging words. but they need a savior who will go in after them, someone who knows the waters. That is why my Savior allowed me to become so strong by my trials and by the treading of difficult water as I waited for my salvation. He didn't allow my circumstances to go on beyond my comfort so I could become hardened by struggle but so that I would become strong enough to fight for more than just myself. Now inside of me is a greater capacity for love. But also a greater responsibility to act on the behalf of those who will not make it to the shore without a hero.

The Olympics call the qualifying preliminaries to get to the games The Olympic Trials. The phrase that comes to mind in the world of sports and fitness is "No Pain, No Gain." if you want to be the best at something you need to go past the point of comfort and even past the point of what you think is possible. How differently could we be living if we saw our trials as a qualifier for greatness? We are created to be champions and overcomers and to use our trails not as stumbling blocks but as training tools on the way to victory.

Romans 5:3-5
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

A hero is forged in the fire of adversity, a hero is someone who does not waste the trials of life on self pity and shame but on an awareness that each of us was made for something so much greater than merely the comfort of a good life. Maybe the reason I cant finish my books is because there is no ending. How do you write a story about eternity?  A long time ago I gave God the pen to my life and I said, "Write! Write me a story so fantastic it will change the world." Who am I to argue with an author who is perfect in all of His ways, who sees the plot unfolding and the resolution to my conflict far clearer than I ever could. He has not created a character in this whole universe that he can not reach. We think we want an easy happy ending but if it isn't earned through overcoming some great obstacle somehow it just seems a little fake and a little less appreciated. We need to trust that God knows how it ends. And He is a good Author.

He writes light out of darkness, from  the very beginning he said, "Let there be Light!!!" Its time to take the pen away from the enemy of darkness and let God create light out of our darkest trials. Many
nightmares have made it hard to want to dream again. The world has become polluted with a shadow of helplessness. But all shadows are dispelled when the purest of light shines. God made us the light of the world. Through the power of His one and only Son, we shine. All darkness was made subject to the power of light from the very beginning and when Jesus walked on earth, He transferred  the right of that light through the sacrifice of His life. But what we do with our light is everything!

Psalm 23
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
² He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
³ He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
⁴ Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
⁵ Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
⁶ Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

We cannot expel darkness if we never venture into the Valley of the Shadow of Death.  Remember we will fear no evil for God leads us through. One light in the dark is seen but how much more hopeful when we bring our light together with one purpose. When we shine together the shadows have no where to hide. Let us not waste the night for we are brightest when it is bleakest. Let us not waste all the strength that we have gained by fighting in the stormy water. God has brought us to shore but we are strong enough to go back in for others. Our story is being written and if we do not allow the conflict to shape us we cannot become the hero He is creating us to be. God wrote me into existence, to be a hero. When conflict arises I will not cower in fear but shout Hallelujah for I know I got the role in His master plan. And through my suffering thousands will know my name but Millions more will know His; the Author and Perfecter of our Faith.

For those still on the shore wondering if its worth it to risk it all on Jesus, to those who are afraid that any more conflict might not shape them but destroy them. Remember that Faith is all about uncertainty but we have hope and trust in a God who always comes through bigger and bigger every time we place our faith in Him. And remember this when being tormented by the lies of the enemy: The Devil only knows what has been written. He knows our past but he does not get the privilege of knowing our future. Our future is yet unwritten. We don't always get to choose the trails we go through but we do get to choose who we go through it with. We are not alone. He walked through darkness; through the Valley of the Shadow, and still chooses to come back and walk it again and again with us so that His light can illuminate the path before us. Will we embark on a journey to do the same for others? That is the story that is still unwritten.

The Monsters Inside and Outside of Me

 

The Monsters Inside and Outside of Me

 

Sometimes late at night I find myself scanning through channels on the Television looking for a something interesting to occupy my down time. If it is really late at night the selection dwindles to infomercials, crime dramas, (not so) reality TV, and the miscellaneous show that I would categorize as “informational TV you never knew you didn’t need to know until you knew it”. One such show is called the “Monsters Inside of Me”. This show is about people who contracted various parasites or viruses that take over, and the story behind it. It’s very disturbing to ponder all of the many things that can take hold of a person when they are least suspecting it. Usually it’s the symptoms that spiral so out of control that they are forced to face the parasitic demons.  It’s a struggle I can’t relate to in the physical but know all too well in a mental, emotional and spiritual way.

Recently I found myself at the very end of myself in a struggle I have faced for almost two decades. I struggle with food. Like so many other struggles that people face it has a power and a hold over thoughts, actions, and emotions for me. But what do you do with an addiction that is revolved around something that you cannot just abandon. The body needs food to function, so in order to conquer its hold you are forced to face it every day no matter how hard the struggle is. I would describe the struggle as having two extremes. The one extreme being over eating, emotional eating, and eating things that are unhealthy to eat. The other extreme is the denial of those habits that lead right into the opposite end of an equally unhealthy lifestyle of starvation, anorexia, self-punishment, bulimia, extreme dieting and or exercise. The struggle is real to find balance when any attempt at such balance just finds you on one side or the other of this toxic battle.

I have had times in my life where I have seen temporary relief, or freedom from the struggle by the grace of God but somehow I just kept finding myself facing the struggle again and again. I wanted to get free but so much shame and a mentality that I should be stronger kept me from asking for the freedom I needed. And finally it came, the moment of revelation that would bring the power of God into my life. It wasn’t lightning or thunder, rather it was that gentle way that God has with us that turns an ordinary day into an extraordinary one. I wasn’t consciously aware of my request for freedom but had just found myself opening my heart up to God. He came in, and in doing that His light shed right into that area of struggle.

I was sitting on my couch reading a book about prayer when all of a sudden my spirit agreed with God that I needed more of Him. In that moment I saw a picture in my mind of something that can only be described as outrageously disturbing.  I saw two demons. Two female twins. One was disgustingly obese, hungry, prideful, arrogant, and demanded her own way. The other was skinny beyond any help, her skin pressed against her bones so tightly she looked like a corpse, she was weak, frail and hated herself. She was shame, self-punishment and loathing. The very next thing I noticed was that they were playing a game. The game was like a puppet show of sorts and I was the toy. I was the object of their game as they vied for control over my thoughts, emotions and actions. For long periods of time the gluttonous prideful demon would be winning and then I the toy would rebel and cry out that I couldn’t bare the self-hatred that those games led to, so unknowingly I would hand myself off to the self-punishing demon for a round of extreme dieting and self-criticism, that would only lead to disappointment and shame.

 

The game went on and on, and the two demons grew stronger with each round. It was as though they feasted on the torment being inflicted upon me. Eating my very flesh with every failed attempt to get free. One of the things that alarmed me as I watched the two was how even though I had never seen their faces before, somehow I knew them all too familiarly. It was as if they were family, part of my history, the dreaded inappropriate relative that you don’t particularly like but what can you do?  That became my very next question. What can I do? I had been believing a lie for so long that I was a failure and that my struggle was stronger and bigger than me. My identity was so wrapped up in this façade they had created for me. I didn’t want to play the game anymore and after twenty years of playing it they had more than outstayed any welcome that I may have at one time offered to them.

We carry our struggles as though they are a part of us. Until they had faces I had no idea that I could be rid of them, until they had faces I had no way of knowing that I could turn them away. But it wasn’t so much the fact that my struggle no longer was faceless as the truth that we can only look into the face of one thing at a time. If I am constantly looking to them or at them as part of me, I won’t be able to also look into the face of Christ who gives me strength, I will forever be divided. The bible says we cannot serve two masters. Often we don’t understand why we are so doubleminded and weak in our walk with God. Often it is because we are slave to our struggles. Christ came to set the captives free. He came to bring abundant life. Our struggles have faces, those things that captivate our thoughts and get in the way of freedom no longer hold the power to bind us. But unless we stand in agreement with God over our freedom and let Him fill us with new life, they will stay like squatters in an abandoned building.

Colossians3:1-2,5

Since then you have been raised with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth.

… So put to death the sinful, earthly things living within you.

 

Your struggles have a face and they don’t belong in the place of honor, and because of Christ we can put them to death.

That show about the parasites, so very much disgusted me. It was the terrifying idea that a monster could be living inside of me. Even the thought of it being near me, just waiting to make me the new home where they would feast upon my flesh. But isn’t that the very thing that happens inside of us as we battle against our unseen enemy. We try to treat the symptoms of a monster with no face. We grow weary and tired of the battle and start to believe that we are crazy, that we are weak, that we are completely helpless to the invaders. There are many spiritual parasites that go undetected in our lives. Many that fly below the radar of detection. To name a few that I have found: Pride, Selfishness, Fear, Addiction, Jealously, Comparison, Shame, Bitterness, Gossip, Slander, Depression,…and the list goes on.

So what do we do about these invaders? We ask the Great Physician to identify them, to remove them, and then we get some seriously good Antibiotics in our system. We reject the lies and get the truth inside of us not only to fill the space that is left bare but also as a preventative measure against future attacks. We strengthen our spiritual immune system by getting spiritual health inside of us.

Is it time to go to the doctor? Is it time to see what unwanted monsters are lurking inside of us? In the physical when we find out that we have been infected we don’t blame the host that infected us, nor do we blame the parasites, they aren’t worth our time once we realize we have the cure. We merely focus in on the one who can set us free and follow his directions to get healthy. So when dealing with your spiritual parasites do not dwell on the disease, the pain, or the past but set your sights on higher things.

Colossians3:1-2

Since then you have been raised with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth.

 

 

Lord, we ask for your revelation every day to reveal the parasites at large within our hearts. We do not merely seek you, the great physician for a consultation but we come to you for deliverance. The parasites no longer will be allowed to feast because we will no longer be the host. Lord I pray for your direction and guidance as we get the good spiritual antibiotics into our system. Help us to pursue the fruit of the Spirit which is loaded with antibodies that we need to fight! We love you so much Lord and recognize that you are a good and loving God who longs for us to be free. Amen   

Listen Up

Listen Up

 

I found myself in tears as I drove away from the Dollar Store. Not because of sadness or regret but because of pure and unmistakable gratitude. This season of live has been one of growth mostly because it has been my hearts’ desire to be in a state of passionate pursuit of God’s heart for this world. I want to love deeper than I ever have; to take the road of trusting Him and never look back.

It was an ordinary event that God used to touch hearts and remind us again that He is everywhere, watching over and waiting for us to learn the art of listening. I had to go to the dollar store to get some supplies for my son’s science project; an ordinary task. It was busy and only one checker was checking people out. My flesh was aware of the inconvenience of the line and I thought to myself that they really needed to do a better job of paying attention to customer demands. I was able to drown out my selfish complaints as I remembered that I had asked God (that very same week) to help me not focus or feel inconvenienced but to instead show patience and love more and more. So instead I offered my spot in line to a couple that approached the line at the same time. There was a man behind them and I all of a sudden became very uncomfortable and seeing how I had no idea why I was uncomfortable I imagined all the bad reasons for this feeling.   

Then in a moment of complete surprise I felt the Holy Spirit whisper deep inside that I was to buy this man’s items for him. It wasn’t more than ten dollars’ worth but I was so uncomfortable with the public embarrassment of the gesture that I tried to explain to God why it was a bad idea. But the nudge only became more undeniable and I had to act.

Now let me just explain that although I am eloquent and put together on paper and even in the small controlled environments of friends and family I can appear very intelligent, witty or even wise at times, I am a complete and total idiot in public around strangers. I have no social skills when it comes to these things and I always try to make the awkwardness go away by being ever so much more awkward. For example: A week ago I was obeying the Holy Spirits prompt to buy a snack at the store for a homeless person outside and when I gave it to her I said, “I sure hope it is warm out today.” First of all it was 2pm and had been warm all day, so it made no sense whatsoever, but also it had no context in the situation. I just felt dumb! I am the most awkward person when I am outside of what I know.

The Holy Spirit gives me what I call the precursor pit in the stomach, the pit of regret I will feel the rest of the day if I don’t act upon what I know is right just to save face. So as the young man checking my items finished and gave the total, I said, “I would also like to buy this man’s stuff too.” The young man checking out the items was really excited about it and said, “that is so cool!” The man behind me said, “Really, are you serious?” In my awkwardness I said, “yes you have been so patient, you let me go first in line and I just really want to bless you.” He got very serious and then said, “I just lost my job.” I said, “well I hope this helps you to have a better day.” He said yes, absolutely, I will pay it forward.” I replied “I just want you to take it in and to have hope. I know God wants to bless you with it.” He then introduced himself and told me he couldn’t wait to tell his wife. I told him I would pray for a new job for him and asked what he did. The conversation was getting less awkward by the moment and the checker was just so excited to be watching it all happen.

I realized as I left to go to my car that God had just showed up at the Dollar Store to love that man. A few things stood out to me in that moment to be more than coincidence; One was that the line was almost ten people long and no other checker came to help, so all those people in line witnessed what was going on. The checker was floored by the act and heard me say multiple times that God wanted to do this. And then of course the thing that ultimately brought me to tears is that God would share with me His heart for this man who really needed a helping hand. I love how God partners with us and allows us in on his plans. I am so honored to be his hands and feet and to be a recipient in such a clear way of His answer to my request that I would love more like Him. The whole thing was such confirmation that God loves making ordinary days something quite extraordinary. When I think of how I almost lost the opportunity to bring a little bit of Heaven to earth just because I was uncomfortable it makes me so grateful that God is challenging me to a new level of trust, Faith and Obedience in Him.

This story isn’t a brag moment on my part because Heaven knows I have missed opportunities to love before. Nor is it a message meant to bring shame that we ought to be doing more. This story is merely a reminder of how much God expectantly waits for us to Listen Up. Literally “Up”. Our ears should be tuned directly into the voice of God. And in those moment when the Holy Spirit speaks we are to act as though nothing else in the whole world matters but responding to whatever is being spoken.

From my experience I can honestly say that He speaks only one language, and that language is love!  And although the world may not understand it or it may seem foreign and strange, we are to change the culture of our world to the culture of heaven, where the words and actions are formed out of love. I think that is why I feel so awkward in these situations, because if I am in Christ, I am a foreigner of this world’s culture. And although it would be more comfortable to pretend that I blend, It would never feel right inside of my soul.

Lord I ask that you give us ears to hear the love language that you are speaking over us and over all of your creation. Help us to love deeper, and be free in who we are in you and so aware of your presence that we are never afraid to bring heaven to earth. I love you so much Lord, help me to love what you love, to see what you see, and to always walk by faith not by might. Thank you Lord for letting us be a part of what you are doing. Amen  

 

 

"Again he appoints a certain day, “Today,” saying through David so long afterward, in the words already quoted, “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts.”"

Hebrews 4:7 ESV

Treasured

 

Treasured

The Lord is speaking a word of value into his Church, upon his Bride. There is so much rejection in this world and he is calling sweetly and softly, hoping that in a moment of stillness His Bride will hear His voice, recognizing the sound of endearment, for He adores us, so much so that He made a straight path. Why would God bend so far down from heaven and with such a grand gesture as Christ’s death for anything less than our whole hearts?  

 

I was in a second hand shop looking for treasure as I often do, when I saw something out of the corner of my eye and in a moment of certainty, I knew it belonged to me. It was a delicate ceramic tea cup with a matching plate. It spoke to me as objects often do in illustrative form. I knew this treasure belonged somewhere special. Call it my desire to see things renewed to their former state of glory but as I looked at the cup I wondered about its vast history, not just the making of it but the journey it had taken up to this point, perhaps the life it had in the home of someone who took it out only for special occasions and the conversations that surrounded it as friends shared intimate words over a cup of tea or coffee. Now here it sat in a junk shop surrounded by many things that had outlived their usefulness and belonged in the garbage.  I knew I had to rescue this treasure and bring it into a home.

 

I wondered now about its future and about the memories that this cup would next. I purchased it as a gift for someone whom I knew would take it and love it and value it the way I did. I gave it to my mom. I watched as she looked upon its details, it’s beauty, it’s delicate intricacies with appreciation and then she did something that made my heart so completely satisfied; I watched as she gently and with much thought put the tea cup in her hutch, finding just the right place for her new treasure. My heart was so moved at the sight of a well received gift that in that silent moment God spoke to me, “I treasure you.”

 

At first I thought about how many times His love has ransomed me, How many times I found myself feeling like a second hand cup on a dusty shelf as His mercy reached out for me and brought me home. But soon I started to think upon the cost of that reunion and I realized that as much as I know God treasures me, I truly and wholeheartedly treasure Him all the more. He is our precious treasure, He bowed Himself so low, even lower than the cup in the junk shop, so that we could be found by Him yes, but even more so, that we could also find Him.

 

 God delights in that moment when we discover our treasure in Jesus, when we gaze upon His intricacies; the sweet delicate details of who our Savior is. I know He smiles as we put Him in that place of highest honor in our hearts. For He thought of us when He sent His son and nothing could make Him happier than when we value that, which He has valued most.

My Prayer in this year to come is that it would be a year of great treasure hunting.  God has promised in His word, “You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all of your heart.” So my prayer for all of us is not just to be found by Him but to find Him in the seeking.

    

The Forgotten Field

 

The forgotten field

 

I took a walk in my dream last night.

It was a lonely brook near a lonely hill, a small overgrown wood lay near the eastern edge and to the west a small forgotten field.

In its glory it was the prized treasure of a farmer and his growing family but now all that remained of those years was a broken down well long emptied of its cool clean water.

I have often wondered where I get that sentimental curiosity, the one that asks the questions that no one seems to ask anymore.   I see a second hand tea cup or handmade apron in a store and wonder of the stories they would tell if they could speak. Of who drank tea by the fire while reading Dickens. Or who filled their homes with the aroma of cookies while their children wiped flour caked hands on the carefully stitched rose at the bottom of the skirt. Whose memories are these that for a moment seem to catch my attention and imaginations?

But this field, was haunting as if the memories had never wandered off. It was different than a mere cup or apron from a store filled with disposable memories. This field was alive. It had a temperature. It had a breath and a brain. It could hear and see, it had a heartbeat. But more to the point it was filled with destiny and purpose, promise and hope.

As I walked, I lightly caressed the tall golden grass that met my fingertips. I saw and heard the grasshoppers playing themselves in a beautiful harmonic way that blended with the winds that gently blew through the leaves of the trees and the grasses as the swayed in rhythm. The brook babbled as its smooth water made its small rocks smoother still with its persistent flow. I knelt low to the ground and picked up dirt that was composted perfectly into gold for a harvest by all the years of waste from the wild plants and animals. This place had a value that had been completely forgotten by any man.

It saddened my heart to think of the old farmer who once valued this field, who once cared for it and fed and watered its soil with his own sweat and toil. What would the farmer say if he could see his field sitting and waiting for someone who would never come to tend this valuable soil? What a waste, what a sad thing to see such a precious treasure go untended, unseen and unutilized.

It’s that moment in a dream that you feel yourself waking up, but you are not quite ready to leave. I held on but the ground beneath me shook, it stopped for a moment. I realized it was the earth waking up, the field was as alive as you or I, breathing in and out. Was it me waking up or was it the field I could not say. But just as soon as I awoke from that world and into this, I wished for just one more moment there. To go back and treasure that field through the eyes of the farmer one more time.

I guess this is the part where I tell you that the field was alive and that it exists not just in dreams. You don’t have to dream to find it although in dreams it seems our fields often find us. For me my forgotten field is not your forgotten field but I would guess that most of us have one somewhere. Few of us make plans to cultivate and harvest and fewer still would recognize it if we saw it.

My forgotten field has five names. It is the husband I promised to care for on our wedding day and the four children I named before they were even in my arms. I see the farmer pointing to places in the field where he wants me to explore, cultivate and harvest, places that this inheritance of ministry that he has given me has in time become like the field with the empty well. It happens even to the best of us that we are given a place where will be so powerful if we can only just remember the value of it and yet we look for other fields to find our purpose.

Have you noticed what time can do to value of things? It either devalues them or makes them more valuable. I have a picture by my front door, when I first put it there it was new and fun to look at and now it is just the wall for as much as I notice it. Have you stared at an image for so long that it loses focus. The monotony of life can cause us to live in a state of un-appreciation and begin to devalue the precious things in life. The forgotten field is usually a place you lived for so long that you couldn’t see its true value anymore. I live by the beautiful Rocky Mountains and yet I have gotten so used to them that I don’t see the beauty anymore but just a background, not un-like a screen saver on a computer. How can we break the pattern of our forgetfulness? How can we see again with fresh eyes? Thankfully all we need to do is go to the farmer that gave us the field in the first place and ask him for fresh eyes.

I believe that our forgetfulness is the reason the bible says that we are to begin anew every morning, and that we are to bring, thanksgiving and praise to Him.

Psalm 136: Give thanks to the Lord for He is good, His love endures forever. Give thanks to the God of Heaven. His love endures forever.  

I had all this seed to sow and I was looking for a field to plant it in. A place to put some roots deep inside and all the while my forgotten field was waiting for me.

Where or who is your forgotten field? Do you know that God has been waiting for you to walk once again in your field of giftedness, in your season of promise? Let Him lead you back and although some weeds may need pulling and some wells re dug for water, there will be a harvest, for you will not toil in vane when you toil for love.

 

 

 

Cheap Faith

 

Cheap Faith

This time of year with the Holidays approaching, it always brings to my mind the nativity scene, gifts, and time spent with family and friends.  I love to give gifts and see the joy on the faces of those who, for that few minutes, have to wonder what is inside. I always love the idea of giving something to my loved ones that will be of true value and great expense and deep meaning to them; so expensive or time consuming that the person receiving the gift will be truly blessed and moved into a spirit of gladness. 

I was asked a challenging question in my devotional this morning. “Are you willing to trust and fulfill His purposes no matter the cost?" I have been very weary lately and very consumed by my rights as a follower of Christ thinking that I don’t deserve some of the challenges and trials that I am facing. I have been so preoccupied with defending my rights that I forgotten that Christ said there would be difficult times and that we would need to trust God through them not scream and yell to be pulled from them.

I think we easily forget that the God who provided one person with the creature comforts of first world life is also the same God of the homeless man on the corner and further still from our sight, the same God of a starving Somalian child in Africa. He doesn’t love me more or less depending on my worldly comforts or discomforts. And often times I fall victim to the same attitudes of the disciples who knew they were walking with a future king but based their perception of his power on an earthly system.

Do I stop in confusion like the disciples did when Christ refuses to be crowned with anything on this earth but a crown of thorns and persecution.  Surely they were hoping that any minute he would use the power he had to raise the dead and heal the blind to overthrow the evil rulers and take his place as King.

I find myself consumed with the truth in 1 Peter. His words although life and light to my struggles are said to a very persecuted church who was often given the choice to denounce Christ or die. And here I am almost derailing my witness because a neighbor doesn’t like the way I park, or the way a tree branch almost touches my house.  I feel offended and claim my rights to not be falsely accused over tree branches while the early church was being wiped with tree branches and hung to die on crosses made from the wood that I out of spite I refuse to trim. My tree (or struggle) is just so silly in comparison to true persecution. None the less I find myself needing Peter’s words all the same to overcome my selfishness.

1Peter 3:8-15

⁸ Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. ⁹ Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. ¹⁰ For, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech.¹¹ They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it.¹² For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” ¹³ Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? ¹⁴ But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.”¹⁵ But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord.

I felt like I was in the boxing ring with my neighbors over all of these silly things, getting pummeled over and over, and all I could say to the enemy of my soul was, “I am not supposed to be in this place of persecution, fighting for my innocence.” I gently heard God say to me yesterday as I was trying so very hard to defend myself, “Get out of the way! I will defend you, but you need to get out of the ring.” I was trying to fight the devil at a game of righteousness and the only one that can ever win that fight against him is my God; the one who paid the highest price for me to be made righteous.

I think we get very frustrated in our walk with God when the road is not straight or the things ahead look daunting. I tend to yell at crooked roads to be straight more than I take God’s hand and tell Him that I trust Him. I tend to speak to my circumstances and get angry when they don’t answer back instead of asking if this faith, to just follow no matter what. This is the priceless gift I can give my God. Hebrews 11:6 says, “But without faith it is impossible to please God.” My question to you is: Even if it is hard to have faith, is it any less important to have it?

We often fall into a Christianity of Convenience, but at the moment that our faith costs us something we tend to be less enthusiastic about it. This is a very big misunderstanding that faith should cost nothing. When something costs us our convenience, when it costs us time, or money or our pride, even our rights, we can take hope that it is not a wasted act that we do when we surrender our will but rather an act of worship to our God that honors Him very much.

1 Peter 4:12-14

¹² Dear friends, don’t be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you. ¹³ Instead, be very glad—for these trials make you partners with Christ in his suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing his glory when it is revealed to all the world.¹⁴ If you are insulted because you bear the name of Christ, you will be blessed, for the glorious Spirit of God rests upon you. 

I wanted to yell at the devil to get out of the way of God blessing me, but I think I just realized that the only one in the way of that is me. God blesses me when I trust Him, when I follow Him even through difficult times, when I surrender the fight to Him and believe that no matter the cost of following him, (even if it means death) that all that matters is bringing glory to his name. And although I may not like the way in front of me and I may even ask God to take it far from me like Christ did right before the crucifixion, I will say what Christ did and with all my heart surrender, “Not my will, but yours be done.” Then truly I can say that my faith was not inexpensive but costly, and my love was not cheap but of great value. This act of surrender is very time consuming and can cost a lot, so on that day when I meet my savior, I hope to present Him a surrendered heart, worth the weight of gold.

 

God help us to remember that when trials come, even small ones we can trust you and in turn trade our sorrows for dancing by living and breathing your will. Help us to turn our worldy struggles in for heavenly rewards when we choose to be surrendered to your will. Help us to love you, love our neighbors and love our enemies as you have commanded, and required of us in return for your great love. I love you so much and I want to please you so I ask for you to help me to discover how to walk in faith more every day. Amen 

Advance

Advance. We were meant for more than stalemate.

Often times we live in a state of defeatism. Maybe it is as insignificant as the looming grey of: laundry that is never finished, a sink of dishes that fills up three times a day, paperwork that stacks up, bills that always need paid, vacations that never come, diapers that always need changed or cars that always need fixed. Or maybe it is more complicated issues that seem to drain us of our will to move forward: lost jobs, serious illness, homelessness, estranged family, mental illness, learning disorders, or even death. Sometimes we just feel like any motion forward is a step back and we find ourselves in a suspended stall pattern or at stalemate with the enemy of our joy.

First it is important that we get our enemy rightly named. God is not our enemy nor does he create situations to harm or hurt his children. Many times I see people struggling with the idea that, “if God is love, than why?” The truth is that God is good and there is no evil in him. Our enemy is the one that says anything in opposition to that one beautiful truth that “God is good!” It was the first lie in the garden, it was an accusation of God’s goodness and it was a trick to steal our birthright.

A story in the bible that I have never really examined much is the story of Jacob and Esau. In this story the son with the birthright, to the entire inheritance of his father was tricked into trading his birthright for a bowl of soup to his less favored brother. I never really understood why even a famished person would be so foolish as to give up his entire wealth for something so small. If his brother refused to feed him, why didn’t he just go to his loving father for food? But I can see that this story is more about the foolish nature of men than anything else.

First we are tempted, by the sight, the smell, the touch of that which is, in the moment, so very desirable. Second we are unaware of the worth of our birthright. And third we are unaware of the advantage and the importance of the authority we have.

Our father has given us something of great value beyond any other treasure. It was taken from us in the garden and restored to us on the cross, and yet we still have so little understanding of its immeasurable value and power. Although the enemy has no legal claim on our inheritance it does not mean that he will not try to trick us out of it, steal it or try to convince us to lay it down in surrender. But we must not allow our inheritance and authority to be so easily taken from us. If it took a crucifixion to once and for all reclaim our birthright than we must never treat God’s sacrifice with such contempt as to devalue the prize of our crucified and resurrected Savior!

God says that the same power that rose Christ from the grave, is living in us! Whether it is the grey cloud of a monotonous task or the overwhelming disease that has no cure, we have been given all authority under heaven to conquer in Jesus name. I believe and I will stand on this truth that I am more than a conquer in Jesus. But unfortunately most of us are living a defeated life of less than a conqueror.

How do we claim our rights as sons and daughters of a King who wants us to be restored to our inheritance and authority? First we recognize our failures to be enough on our own and ask forgiveness. Second we ask Him to be the very thing we need in our lives; our Savior and our God. And third we accept the authority given to us by Him and walk in the power of a surrendered life to His covenants, promises, and plans. As the scripture says: If God is for us, then who can be against us. No weapon formed against us shall stand.      

Are you in stalemate? Stale mate is chess terminology meaning there is no move to make where you can win. Do you feel like life, or the enemy of your life, has you backed into a corner? How can we be better aware of the strategy that gets us not only free, but winning the way God intended.

In worship the other day God showed me a visual of the earth as a chess board and the pieces were advancing in patterns that were making a difference in this world. I saw the worshipers of God on the front lines and they were laying down their lives in surrender to God’s plan knowing that Christ was at one time a servant to all and as he advanced in total surrender to God’s plans even unto death he went through that Valley to emerge not a servant but a king! In chess when a pawn makes it to the other side of the board he is what they call promoted. At this time he can be upgraded to the most powerful piece on the chessboard. He becomes royal and can move in power over the whole board. He had the enemy at check mate on the cross and we have the advantage of our birthright in Him. We must advance, because there are so many who don’t even know that they have a BIRTHRIGHT. No more stalemate! We need to know the calling’s, gifting’s and talents he has given to us in order to advance.

 I feel as though God said we are all pawns at some level and that we are called to worship and serve the King but that there are some very special pieces on the board. These people, I believe are the ones who have been awakened to the fight and are ready to answer the call.  

The Pawn

Pawns are unusual because they move and capture in different ways: they move forward, but capture diagonally. Pawns can only move forward one square at a time, except for their very first move where they can move forward two squares. Pawns can only capture one square diagonally in front of them. They can never move or capture backwards. If there is another piece directly in front of a pawn he cannot move past or capture that piece.

I believe that Worshipers are the pawns, throughout the Old Testament when God wanted to win a battle for His people, He often called in the worshipers! They would go out in worship and spiritually a battle would ensue that could accomplish more than a physical battle, and be won for the glory of God. The people who lead us in worship are on the front lines and are often attacked by the enemy because of the stance that they take to lead the rest of God’s people into the fight. As close as they get to confronting the enemy, I find it a thing of beauty that they are not able to be taken head on and can only be captured from a blind spot. This is also a great opportunity for the other pieces like the Bishops (intercessors) to guard those blind spots. It is also important to note that these pieces are not created to move backwards, they are the titans of advancing and will feel frustrated if they feel as though they are being pushed back.   

 
The Rook (The Castle)

The rook may move as far as it wants, but only forward, backward, and to the sides. The rooks are particularly powerful pieces when they are protecting each other and working together!

The castle is a strong fortress and was always my favorite piece, I believe these pieces are very intimidating to the enemy and he can see them coming from a long ways away. They are not hidden and I feel as though this describes the leadership roles of the church, the teachers, the preachers, the evangelists. These pieces are not just intimidation for the enemy but security for all the other pieces on the board, they can see the strong towers and pillars of faith and the other pieces can in confidence follow and flow in the callings they were designed to be because at any moment they can look around and see that they are not alone. Accountability is also a vital thing to recognize for these pieces, they are more powerful when working in pairs to watch each others back.

The Bishop

The bishop may move as far as it wants, but only diagonally. Each bishop starts on one color (light or dark) and must always stay on that color. Bishops work well together because they cover up each other’s weaknesses.

I feel as though I am learning to be a Bishop. Bishops are the prophetically gifted and the Intercessors of the church. I say this because they can see things in blind spots and they move diagonally. Often times the enemy hits in our blind spot but God has gifted some of us to see the attack before it happens. A word of encouragement, a prayer for protection, a healing touch, an anointed move that in turn prevents damage and restores the stolen advantage.

 

The Knight

Knights move in a very different way from the other pieces – going two squares in one direction, and then one more move at a 90 degree angle, just like the shape of an “L”. Knights are also the only pieces that can move over other pieces

These are the Service Gifting’s. Hospitality, Encouragement, Exhortation, Giving, Helps, Mercy and so on. These pieces are the hands and feet of the Lord’s work, the movers and shakers and are able to just get in there and spread the love of Jesus no matter where they are or who they are. They are the only piece that can move around both the obstacles of the enemy and the congestion of the rest of the body of Christ. They can move in and out of places that others cannot and they are effective in rescuing the lost in unconventional ways. The knight doesn’t move like any of the rest of the pieces and cannot be expected to but without them the productivity of love is hindered.

 

One thing that I love about this analogy is that each piece is not only an offensive player but a defensive player, protecting the other pieces on the board. If our Rook is in danger our Bishop can advance in prayer to provide coverage. We are all a part of the kingdom of God and although we have different strengths and weaknesses, together we are strong. And together we can bring glory to the king and destroy the works of the enemy, uncovering the eyes of those who do not see the inheritance before them, and waking up the ancient purposes of God that have remained dormant in the hearts of men too long! We are to advance! Not shutter in fear of destruction, but to be the destroyer of the enemies’ plans and purposes, bringing freedom to the captives!

It is possible that if we feel as though we are not moving forward it is because we are not the piece that we thought we were. God might have created you to be a Rook or Bishop or Knight, or maybe a Pawn. But if we try to move in a calling that is not our own we will not be effective. Not only do we need to be active in the proper gifting’s but we need to be in the proper space on the board. The importance of knowing our gift is just as vital as the location of our hearts in that gift. It is our hearts that are often miss located more than our feet. I struggled with several callings that weren’t mine all while rejecting callings that were.

A calling can be a prison or a palace depending on the location of your heart’s desire in that thing. If we surrender our hearts to God’s calling and unlike the brother who sold his calling for a bowl of soup, we see the value in it. We can then be blessed instead of cursed in that area. I am mom of four and my home can often feel more like an insane asylum than a place of growth and nurturing. But there is so much wealth and authority when you let God open your eyes to the value of what He has given you. It starts with Thanksgiving, and repentance for disvaluing what he has called important. It then turns into Praise and appreciation for allowing us to be chosen. And then it turns into victory!

We are all given a place in God’s Kingdom, some of us are living it in fullness, some of us are struggling with our role or space, and some of us are in the corner hoping that we never have to move. But we are not called into stalemate, we are called into the authority and royalty of God’s kingdom. The moment we surrender it all to Him is the moment we live a fulfilling and satisfying life, free from fear, full of love and guided by his voice and intimate presence.